


What are the chances I tell you I love you

by wherewestart



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, I am Supercorp Trash, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Lena Luthor Loves Kara Danvers, Lena Luthor just needs to say it out loud
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2020-10-20 23:31:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20683757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wherewestart/pseuds/wherewestart
Summary: Lena is in love. Lena is in love with her best friend.What happens when Kara moves her company, KaraDanvers.com into the L-Corp building and Lena gets to see her every. day.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first! Supercorp fic. Warning, fluff ahead. Hope you enjoy :-)
> 
> I also shout blame back to [DreadPirateBrown](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreadPirateBrown/pseuds/DreadPirateBrown) for this.

Lena stood in the lobby of her building, looking out the glass walls to a bustling street of taxi cabs and hurried bodies in and out of door turnstiles, _probably late for work, _she thought. It was early and her tiredness was a reminder she had forgotten her usual cup of coffee from her favorite café on account of a tech crisis at 4am. After she swiftly handled the incompetence and inconvenience, it was just another day at L- Corp for everyone else in her swanky National City high rise but today was special for Lena. It was the day Kara Danvers moved her young company, KaraDanvers.Com to a suite in her building.

She took a long sip of the less than desired cup of coffee from the convenience cart just outside her building. She grimaced as the cheap bitterness burned down her throat. Kara should be arriving any minute and Lena had to focus on something else before her nerves got away from her. Just thinking about Kara did something to Lena, something she grew fond of, a warmth, a feeling of home, _love_ _but not the friend way _if she reached down to pit of her gut and pulled the real emotion label out. She took a deeper look into the window, focusing on her reflection. Her outfit wasn’t perfect in her mind but at 4am it was the best she could do. She cocked her head to the side to inspect the important parts of what she could see in the makeshift mirror- smoothed out her black skirt and made sure the tuck of her pale red blouse was just right before she angled to the side to make sure her heels were the correct height and lifted her back side to her satisfaction with a quick smooth of her hair tightly back in a bun.

“_Not bad.”_

She glanced around to make sure no one saw her wardrobe check and focused back on the street. Lena noticed a black pick up truck roll to a stop in the delivery parking. _Alex. _She couldn’t see anyone because Alex’s truck windows were tinted so dark it was a miracle she could see out of them. One by one the doors opened, Winn hopping out in a pair of jeans and button up, James following, almost matching. Lenas nerves spiked again and her mouth went dry as the passenger door opened and saw Kara exit. Her long blonde waves of hair were floating in the wind and she looked relaxed and laughing towards Winn in jeans and a blue t shirt. Kara’s wide smile always brought out one in Lena- not an overzealous grin but a calm and comforting lift of the corners of her mouth. Alex swooped around the front of her truck with a determined face as she fixed her leather jacket and tossed her sunglasses on top of her head. Lena enjoyed when the group was seemingly relaxed, a far cry from late nights at the DEO and super suits.

They all gathered at the trucks tailgate and one by one took a box from the back and walked into the lobby. By now Lena took another glance at her coffee and decided the best place for it was the trash as she headed to the door to greet everyone. As they filed in Lena took a subtle deeper breath and stood up straighter as Kara entered. Over the years she learned to _try _to control her emotions around Kara. Year after year Lena started to feel her feelings crossing a line with every interaction, every simple touch turning acquaintance feelings, to friends to _oh shit I’m in love with my best friend. _After she found out she was Supergirl and realized Kara could literally hear her organs, the only thing Lena didn’t have to worry about hiding, she decided learning breathing exercises was at the top of her list.

“Lena!” Kara’s face excitedly greeted her with her arms full of a cardboard box as her voice echoed off the walls. The box was full of a random assortment of items poking out- a desk lamp, notebooks, trophies from her recent award winning publishings. Lena leaned in as she stood in front of Kara, the rest of her friends standing behind waving hello, “I’d ask if you need help but I know it’s probably more painful pretending things are heavy,” she said as she leaned away with a wink. Kara returned with a breathy chuckle as she tried to push her glasses back on her face with her shoulder that fell when Lena got close.

“We are so excited to have you here, let me show you to your new home.” Lena spun on her heels and guided everyone to the elevator. Once everyone was in, she pressed the button for the top floor. “Hope you like heights,” Lena offered the packed elevator as she faces the doors.

“This is going to be epic!” Winn exclaimed as he adjusted the box he was carrying with a bent knee, the contents slightly rattling. Lena looked back for a moment, everyone smiling at Winn and agreeing.

When Lena exited, heels clicking on the white marble floor, she opened the first door on the left. The door was a heavy, ceiling to floor glass and Lena had Kara’s new “KD” logo etched on the front. She smirked with pride as they all cheered when they saw it. She held it open as everyone moved in and took in the office. It was more than enough space for three people. Kara took Nia and James with her – Lena didn’t hold it against her, she encouraged Kara to take a risk and pursue her dreams, she knew it was always a possibility to take her trusted coworkers with her. The entry way was grand, but welcoming. There was a reception desk with a glass wall behind it, dawning the logo once more. Around the corner was a wide-open room with four separate rooms to the back. Everyone had a separate office with windows and a view of the city, a private conference room across from the kitchen to the far left and space in the middle for growth. For now, it just held comfortable couches and chairs facing each other with alternating with a white and gray colors and random glass top desks for workspaces on top of shades of grey carpet tiles. During the construction phase Kara wanted the space to be inviting as possible and comfortable as possible and Lena made her vision come true with the pops of pale rose and faded grays in the décor and wall colors and clean lines in the furniture choices. Lena even brought in potted plants for green accents.

Everyone set the boxes down and walked through the space as Lena stood in the background and watched their reactions. Kara stood in the middle of the office, almost spinning like a child looking at the ceiling, the floors, gliding her hand over a white leather couch, then over a gray fabric chair opposite and Lena hoped she noticed her favorite flowers sitting in her new office. “Wow, Lena, this place is so amazing, better than whatever we had on paper. I’m not sure how I’ll ever repay.”

Lenas arms were crossed but she let one free to wave off Kara’s idea. “Don’t be silly Kara, that’s what friends are for. Just give me and CatCo a run for our money and we will call it even.”

James came running out of his office, ran into Nia’s, then Kara’s, looking all confused, flabbergasted, and excited at once. “Lena! You put full bathrooms and showers into each office!”

Lena nodded with a smile, “yes, I figured it was worth it since you all will be in and out so much- interviews, working out, costume changes, the usual.” Lena was proud that comment even got Alex to smile. Alex didn’t seem so concerned with the aesthetics of the office but more so the safety of the building, who had access to what floors, the doors being always locked, and even checked the safety of the balcony Kara’s office opened up to make sure she had direct flight to and from.

“Well I’d say you’ve out done yourself, Lena.” Alex said as she took one last look around the room. “Kara is one lucky girl,” she stared at Lena with raised eyebrows a moment too long for comfort, Lena smoothing out her skirt for relief.

Alex finally broke eye contact and motioned to Winn. “Well, lets go, we need to get back to the DEO to meet Nia and Brainy. Let’s leave James and Kara to it.”

Lena nearly interrupted Alex, “I better get back to work too, let me know if you need anything while moving in.” In that moment Kara rushed over to Lena and gave her a hug that felt more Supergirl than Kara, leaving Lena to pat Kara’s back with a coughed out “you’re welcome.”

Kara quickly backed away and grabbed her shoulders, “oh my goodness, Lena I’m so sorry are you okay?” That sounded concerned with a hint of amusement as she giggled at the ‘okay’ that Lena returned with a laugh. “I’m fine, I’m fine, Kara. Glad you like everything. I’ll see you soon.”

Lena walked back to her office, just down the hall. She sat at her desk and took a moment to take it all in. The past few months of planning the move for Kara didn’t seem real, or rather it moved so fast and she was so busy she didn’t have time to think about it. She was mostly distracted every time Kara came to the office when it was under construction and had to wear a hard hat, if anyone could look adorable in a hard hat, it was Kara. But now with it done and her moving in, Lena was wondering how she was going to keep her heart from leaping out of her chest every time she passed her door, wondering if Kara could hear her coming.

The thoughts were short lived as Lena was interrupted by her assistant Jess, reminding Lena of another meeting.

——

One meeting turned in to five and the day turned to night quickly. Lena hadn’t eaten all day, her stomach was growling and starting to hurt, and she still had to grab the rest of her personal items from her office. She walked across the building as her meetings were in a department so separated from the rest, her feet almost dragging on the tile all the way to the elevator. On the lonely ride up she rubbed the back of her neck for some relief after the long day of sitting and hovered over financial documents, yelling about numbers with board members. When she looked up and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirrored walls, she took a step closer, recognizing the missed sleep opportunities deposited under her eyes. The elevator door opened, and she took a long heavy blink and slow steps out and she immediately noticed the light on in Kara’s office. The suite had been vacant so long just seeing a light on was alarming, but it was so late at night she assumed Kara mistakingly left it on. Normally she wouldn’t invade Kara’s privacy but for the sake of saving electricity she let herself in. When she rounded the corner of the reception area, she was startled by the sight of Kara lounged on the couch reading a paper. As Lena put her hand over her heart Kara looked over with a wide smile and removed her glasses. “I knew that was you!” Kara says as she sits up from her laying position.

“Kara! I’m so sorry I didn’t think anyone was here I was just about to shut the lights off.”

Kara stands and adjusts her shirt and pants, walking closer to Lena. “Well I figured if I’m taking over CatCo one day, I’ll have to channel my inner Lena.” Kara said as she adjusted a tie knot that isn’t around her neck, but it made Lena laugh. She continued, “But seriously though it’s so late. We both need to get to sleep.”

Kara put her hand on Lena’s shoulder as if trying to convince her further but all it did was make her heart race and make her feel more awake. This was something Kara did a lot, subtle and friendly touches here and there, maybe it was tiredness or lack of nourishment for the day, but she felt this touch deep down. Her patented Kara Danvers proof breathing technique kicked in just at that moment and Kara removed her hand.

“Admittedly I haven’t had the most pleasant day and haven’t eaten. I know it’s late but are you hungry?” Lena asked.

Kara scratched her head, “well… actually I figured you’d be coming back, I checked with Jess earlier and I ordered you food, it’s in your office. Didn’t arrive too long ago, Jess gave up some of your calendar secrets,” she said with a wink.

Lena stood up straighter with a puzzling look, “Oh did she? Well, certainly can’t have that.”

Kara started to fumble her words, “well – I Uh - don’t fire her, I was being very pushy it’s not her fault.”

“Joking, Kara.”

Lena watched as Kara shook off the relief, and responded, “I have some more boxes to unpack so I’ll be here a little while longer, I hope you enjoy dinner.”

Lena thought about eating alone in her office and it didn’t sound appealing in her own head. “Did you need help? I can come back with the food, I certainly can’t finish all of it myself. And knowing you, it’s probably a couple bags?”

Kara surrendered her hands, “guilty.”

Lena walked down the hall to her office, happy Jess went home for the day. She usually stays until Lena does, but even she knows the advantages to being home for dinner.

Lena returned with the massive amount of food she found on her desk. Two bags that could feed six people and a bottle of wine she had stored. Lena emptied the bags, one carton at a time onto the table in the middle of the office, smirking at Kara every time she pulled yet another carton out like a magician.

Kara shrugged her shoulders, “what? I didn’t know what you’d be hungry for.”

Lena shook her head, “darling, you ordered the whole menu.”

Kara folded her arms against her chest, “well I have a fridge now thanks to my new landlord here, leftovers are welcome.”

As Lena set out the cartons, Kara took small amounts from each and made two plates. Lena appreciated gesture, it was normal to work well and in unison with Kara, no effort needed, no pressure, just comfortable and easy.

Lena takes bites of her food between helping unpack boxes in Kara’s office, mostly all of Kara’s nicknacks that are so _her- _a golden pineapple figurine, pillows for the furniture, and her desk supplies, Lena was extra careful with Kara favorite recorder, gently placing it in one of the desk drawers. Kara had perched herself on top of the desk after emptying yet another box, Lena stand next to her, and picked up the pineapple with a questioning look to Kara who was stuffing her cheeks with noodles. She excitedly nods at Lena as if she wants to say _yes! Cool, right? _but can’t through her puffed out cheeks. With a couple quick chews, she’s finally able to answer. “Yes, a gift from Eliza. Means something like welcoming and good fortune or something, I can’t remember.”

Lena inspects the pineapple again, thinking back to her old history classes and significance of giving a pineapple as a gift and wonders if that’s factually accurate but instead puts her energy on sitting next to Kara on top of her desk, kicking her heels off with a sound of relief. Lena felt Kara’s eyes on her as she scooted close but thought nothing more of it then making sure she had enough room. The desk was outrageously big, but she wanted to make sure Kara had enough room for her computer and space to lay out photos, printed articles, whatever she needed.

Kara sighed, “I don’t know how you do this all the time. I’m here late once and swear if I could, I would hear my bed calling my name.”

Lena playfully knocked Kara’s shoulder with her own. She never fully understood how Kara gives herself the least amount of credit with all that she does between being an amazing journalist and Supergirl. “We aren’t that different, you know.” Kara gives Lena a puzzling look at her statement and opens her mouth to talk again but Lena stops her, “look, all I’m saying is, yes, I work- a lot. But it’s because I enjoy what I do and know I create technology that helps people. I could say the same thing for you, for Supergirl. You are practically on call twenty -four seven. That’s no small feat, Kara.”

Lena reached behind her as Kara said, _“_thank you”, grazing Kara’s arm with her own, she grabbed her wine, turned back and took the last sip with a stretched neck. In the exaggerated move her blouse shifted beneath her bra and she quickly adjusted it back. She looked back at Kara, whose mouth was agape, and questioned to her, “what?” Kara shook her head and adjusted her glasses, hastily replying to Lena, “nothing, nothing.”

“Maybe you’re right. Maybe we are similar,” Kara admits.

“What!? You just said I was right! Kara Danvers, can I get that on the record?” Lena lets out a loud chuckle and casually puts her hand on Kara’s knee. When Lena realizes her hand is on Kara’s knee she freezes and finally _feels_ her hand on Kara’s knee, then being cupped by Kara’s own hand. For a strong person her grip was comfortably delicate and building a pleasant heat. Lena took a deep breath and exhaled, following it with a calm and cool smile as she locked eyes with Kara. She was unsure if Kara felt the same full body high in the moment as she stared at Kara with full lips and piercing blue eyes. There was always something about Kara that Lena’s mind threatened to toss out the calculated risk logic. She wanted Kara but would never cross that line without her consent, but for a moment she thought they might, until Kara’s phone buzzed against the glass top startlingly them both out whatever it was they were in.

“Ah. Alex needs me,” Kara said slowly with a hint of disappointment. Lena wanted to stop her from leaving but knew she wouldn’t.

Kara sighs and looks around. They had been unpacking all night but there were still empty boxes and packaging everywhere. “Tomorrow it is.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll have the maintenance crew clean this all up overnight.” Lena said.

Kara’s face squirmed as it typically did in situations where she felt unsure, “Are you sure?”

Lena ushered Kara off the desk, face still displaying a guilty unsure feeling, “yes yes now go. I won’t be responsible for Supergirl being late to save lives.”

Kara brought Lena in for another hug, and quick surprising kiss to her cheek. When Kara pulled away, she looked just as surprised as Lena. She quickly backed away from Lena, towards her balcony, “Thank you! Tomorrow, lunch? On you,” she said with a wink as she removed her glasses and within seconds she was gone.

Lena walked out of the office and sat on the couch in the middle of Kara’s office, clutching one of Kara’s gray pillows she brought, the silence so apparent now. She scrunched her fingers through her still tight hair bun, looking around at the finished details Kara brought to the place. Every accent she added softened the harsh office furniture lines, making it feel like a home. _Perfectly Kara, _Lena announced to the empty room and she stood, shut the lights off to head home for the night.

——

It was Friday, Kara moved in on Monday and Lena hadn’t seen her since then. She wouldn’t classify it as deliberate avoidance, but Lena didn’t know any other method to calm the flips in her stomach every time she passed her office door on the way to her own. She was just glad she couldn’t see Kara’s desk from the hall, the temptation to be distracted by her occupied her mind enough.

Lena was sitting on the couch in her office, the news on the TV in front of her. She immediately knew Kara wasn’t in her office because Supergirl was front and center on TV as breaking news putting a blanket around a child, she just saved from a house fire. Seeing her automatically makes her smile, a familiar feeling, but also made her realize how much she missed not interacting with her all week. In an instant from seeing Supergirl on the news, as if Kara could now hear Lena’s thoughts, she was coming through her office door with take out. Kara held up the bag with a smile as she approached Lena, “I figured you’d be hiding here.”

Lena looked at the TV, then Kara, then the TV as she adjusted the bottom of her floral dress that hit just above her knee.

“I- Kara I just saw you on tv. That must be a new world record in speed.”

“Ah! It was nothing. Would you believe me if I said I was on my way here and heard that, then came back?” Kara questioned as she made herself at home, sitting next to Lena on the white couch and pulling out the styrofoam boxes.

Lena chuckled, “well it’s certainly more impressive.”

Kara raised her eyebrows, “mission accomplished.”

“And the mission was?”

“To impress you,” Kara confidently said as she took a bite of her burger. Lena briefly choked on her burger.

Kara looked accomplished but sounded worried, “Are you okay?” Lena nodded.

“You look good today,” Kara said as she snacked on a french fry.

“Oh, this old thing? Thanks.” Lena said sarcastically but the full truth was now that Kara had moved in Lena made sure every outfit was extra fierce.

After the two finished their quick meal they sat relaxed, looking full of food on Lena’s couch. Kara sat and gathered their waste into a single bag. “So, what are you doing tonight?” Kara asked Lena who immediately gave an unimpressed response, “there’s a L-Corp fundraiser I have to be at.”

“You sound exited,” Kara said and looked back at Lena with a raised eyebrow and suspicious smile.

“It’s for charity so it’s for a good reason but I don’t feel like being very social tonight…” Lena said and thought more about getting the energy to dress up and talk to board members and donors.

Kara turned to Lena, “I could go with you. If you wanted me to of course.”

Lena was shocked at the response. Kara has been to her events before, sure- as Supergirl. But the way she said it sounded personal, not for protection. Lena fished for confirmation, “Well I don’t think we have any immediate security concerns.”

Kara adjusted her glasses with a shy smile, “no like, me and you,” she said as she gestured between her and Lena. “We need to relax. I’ll have the James take over for the night if anything crazy happens, the city has been quiet since Lex. Come on we can tag team the dance floor.” As Kara said this she jokingly shimmied in her seat. Lena let out a breathy laugh, Kara’s ability to make her laugh never wavered since the first time she met her, even when _Lex _hit her lips.

Lena nodded. It wasn’t the worst idea. Playing dress up with Kara, drinks, food, it felt like fun for once. “That could work. I’ll pick you up at 8?”

“I’ll be ready with bells on.”

Lena brought her index finger and thumb to pinch the bridge of her nose, “You are such a dork.”

Lena watch as Kara’s face went from smiling to smug, Kara stood and grabbed a mint from the bowl in the middle of the glass coffee table in front of them and began to walk out, turning at the last minute, “You love it! I’ll see you soon!”

——

It was eight o’clock, Lena had been waiting for ten minutes in the backseat of her car for Kara. She isn’t shocked, but she is getting impatient. She also is wondering if her long black dress is wrinkling with the extra time in the car. She shifts in her seat to straighten the silk like fabric out and crosses her legs, impatiently jiggling her foot, the heel of her stiletto tapping the side panel of the car door. She adjusts the gold rings on her right hand, checks her pin straight hair in a mirror and just as she glances back up Kara is coming out of the door, carefully walking down the steps in her own bright blue heels and color matching elegant flowing dress with a plunge neck line that didn’t leave room for the imagination. Her blonde curls stood out against the color and Lena was happy she was alone, _boxes Lena- boxes._

Kara got in the car and apologized for being late – Lena late, which is typically on time.

“You look amazing,” Lena offered Kara. Lena couldn’t stop staring, up-close she saw how the delicate straps of the dress rested on her defined shoulders.

“I could say the same,” Kara returned with a smile.

After that the car ride was mostly silent, Lena couldn’t stop taking glances at Kara, and she nervous for the first time in a long time and while she knows this isn’t a date it sure felt like one. Before they got out, Lena looked into Kara’s blue eyes, “you ready?”

“Let’s do this!” Kara said as the driver opened the door, letting her out into a sea of bright lights. Lena followed behind her, walking a makeshift red carpet into the event.

After a few snaps of a camera, a journalist with an outstretched arm and recorder yelled for Lena, “Miss Luthor! What happened to Lex, did you get rid of him yourself or pay someone at L-Corp!?”

Lena’s blood ran cold at hearing his name, stopping her graceful steps forward she turned to the man who was wearing a black ball cap and snapping chewing gum, he looked smug that he got her to stop and stretched his arm out further. Lena composed herself and smoothed out her dress, “When you find him ask him for me. We are excited tonight to raise money for the children’s hospital, would love it if you made time to donate.” Lena offered him a warm smile. It’s been so perfectly rehearsed her whole life to respond with grace it’s now second nature. When she turns back around her smile fades the slightest and Kara was right by her side, leaning to whisper in her ear, with a hand in her arm, the touch now turning her blood warm, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine Kara, let’s go in.” She didn’t mean it to sound so sharp, but it landed that way judging by Kara’s twisted mouth expression.

The event was set up just as Lena planned as she looked around in the entryway. The venue was grand, marble floors, high ceilings, columns every twenty feet wrapped in bright colored silk with different colored lights going every direction on the walls and she ordered circus acts to be randomly set up throughout each of the floors. The first floor was the main attraction and when Lena looked up, she saw every other floor, guesting hanging out and leaned over the railing looking down, sipping their drinks, smiling and laughing. The champagne server in the middle of the first floor was an aerial artist hanging from silk fabric on the high ceiling, pouring perfect glasses with different appendages and positions, handing one to Lena with one hand and another glass to Kara with her other hand simultaneously, upside down. There was a fire breather in one corner and a trapeze artist performing in the air between all the floors. There were performers on stilts wearing exaggerated black suits with pants that ran to the floor passing out appetizers. It was mesmerizing and exciting and Kara was having fun, to Lena that meant the most as she made her way through crowds of people who kept calling her name, wanting her time and opinion on topics Kara seemed to try to be invested in without getting distracted by some sort of odd performance.

In one group, the men seemed to be more interested in the woman Lena brought to the event. A man in a boring black suit and bow tie asked, “So Kara, what do you do?”

Kara adjusted her glasses, “Well I used to work for CatCo, but I recently just started my own firm, Kara Danvers dot com. I’m actually taking office space in the L-Corp building.”

The stranger seemed to be taken back, “Lena, you own CatCo, feels like a conflict of interest? Or just sleeping with the enemy?”

Lena watched as Kara was offended. She hoped not at the insinuation they were sleeping together but that was neither here nor there in this moment. She lightly touched Kara’s arm as she noticed her mouth start to open and talked above it. “Neither. Kara is a friend who needed help and as a business owner I encourage competition, it’s what helps us stay on our toes. Now when Kara does take off, yes I’ll probably have to kick her out.” Lena says this with a fake laugh, one she sometimes can’t distinguish with her real one in moments like these. The men laugh back, as she knows they would. She takes the last sip of her champagne and wags the glass at Kara, “Ah, lets go fill up. Gentlemen, please have fun tonight and don’t forget to help the hospital. Any of your servers can take donations.”

As Lena walks off with Kara, she loops her arm in hers to the bar.

While waiting in line, Kara looked around the room, “This really isn’t your typical Luthor fundraiser, this is amazing I feel like a kid here.”

“Thanks. I wanted a fun approach to this one and exactly that, remind people what it was like to be a kid, have fun, and hopefully open their wallets more.”

Lena noticed a blush on Kara’s face, and she unexpectedly broke her typical eye contact as she replied,” that’s – wow, such a great idea.”

Lena orders a drink and smiles as she remembers her surprise for Kara and leans in to whisper, “Order the steel bender.”

Kara chuckles, “the what now?”

Lena mischievously smiles back, “trust me. I synthesized the alien alcohol from the bar, it’s safe for humans now but will work on you. If you want.”

“Lena Luthor.” Kara says.

“Kara Danvers?” Lena replies.

Kara shook her head in disbelief, “this is truly a proud moment. This is a new level of Lena genius.”

Lena couldn’t help the blush on her face, and she’s had too much champagne to try to self regulate her breathing and heat rate, knowing Kara is probably listening even though she hates it when she does.

Lena watched as Kara takes a sip of her drink, wincing as she swallowed. “Oh, I think tonight will be awesome now. I need to text James. Tell him I will not be on call.”

Lena laughed at Kara’s newfound future of the night. The next hour went the same but Kara was more relaxed, and they were enjoying the event. Lena doesn’t remember the last time she had fun at one of these. Or wanted to stay. They finally made it to the top floor. Each floor had a theme that ranged from acrobats, exotic animals to magicians. The top floor was a huge magic show, one Lena found herself in the middle of with Kara. The poor magician was no match for Kara as she brought them into the middle of a gathering crowd. Lena looked at Kara knowingly while the magician set up, talking to the crowd with nonsense Lena didn’t care for, she was always a skeptic and trying to figure out the logic behind the magic. Kara once again brought her lips close to Lena’s ear, something they’ve been doing all night to hear each other over the music, talking and laughter, “don’t worry I’ll play along.” Lena smiled and nodded, taking another long sip of her drink after feeling the heat of Kara’s breath on her ear. The last time they were faced with a magician Kara snuffed out all his tricks with her Xray vision and innocently ruined it for Lena.

It was coin trick. Lena stared at the magician wearing a white button down, black vest and black pants suspiciously as he placed three coins in her hand and closed her fingers over her palm, wagging his fingers in a show that they were empty, and even did a quick check up his sleeves to make it extra believable. He then had Kara put her hand over Lena’s and count to three. He instructed Kara to take her hand off and Lena to open her hand. They both looked down into Lena’s palm with shock. Five coins. He smiled and the crowd roared. A small but effective trick that even impressed Lena. Tomorrow she would blame it on the scotch, impressing her took more than a few coins. He had her do it in reverse and five coins turned back into three. He even let Lena inspect the coins after as Kara watched. Lena looked at Kara suspiciously. The only stayed for the one trick as the crowd wanted in on the fun.

Standing outside of the crowd Lena looked Kara up and down. “Out with it.”

Kara giggled, clearly becoming intoxicated and Lena was enjoying it. “What?”

“Kara.” Lena said half serious.

“Ok, ok, he has two extra coins up his sleeves when I looked and slyly stacked them in your palm when he closed your hand. The reverse way, two of the coins were secretly magnetic.”

“I knew it.” Lena said, sarcastically stomping her foot and taking yet another sip of her drink.

“Awww Lena,” Kara reached out and rubbed her shoulder, “you’re so cute when you’re mad.”

Lena giggled and playfully stuck out a pouting lower lip.

Kara suddenly put her body in front of Lena, she was confused for the moment, “Kara, what the” but a familiar voice pulled Lena away, “Miss Luthor! Come on you have to give me more about Lex!”

The same journalist from earlier in the night was quickly jogging towards Lena with arm stuck out with the recorder. He tried to get around Kara, but it was proven impossible. Kara had her body positioned directly in front of Lena now, one arm back, touching Lenas side. “Reporters aren’t allowed in, this is a charity event, please leave or I’ll call security,” Lena said talking around Kara and gently nudging her to show she was okay.

The eager man started in again, “It’s just weird, right? Lex was in your custody, he tried to ruin the world and now what? He’s just gone?”

Lena pointedly stared with pursed lips at the man with no response. She was buzzed off the night and her drinks but had enough to know better than to engage. _Boxes. _Just then two security members removed the man who was yelling the entire way out, Lena now politely waving to the crowd who was gathered, watching, waiting for something to unfold.

“Are you okay?” Kara asked.

“Damnit Kara, I feel like you’ve been asking me that all night.”

“I- I haven’t been, just you sound different, your heart, your breathing- just, I’m just trying to see if you’re okay.” Lena watched as Kara stumbled over her words and regained composure.

Lena did feel bad for her tone and words, it was the second time tonight she couldn’t control them, even towards the woman she was having so much fun with, “I’m sorry, I am. I just- I’ll be right back ok?”

“Sure, I’ll be right here.” Kara answered concerned.

Lena walked away to nearest bathroom. She passed a few guests on the way in, all acknowledging a Luthor in their presence with quick talk, but Lena hung out in front of a mirror, trying to put on her most graceful _please leave me alone _face and she finished a conversation. She took a few deep breaths, adjusted her lipstick and looked at herself a moment longer. It was nothing she couldn’t handle. Being asked about Lex was a part of it all. But knowing Lex wasn’t going to randomly show up in her life anymore wasn’t something she’d fully dealt with yet. She shook her head, _a_ _box. A deep, fucking box._

She walked back out from the bathroom and and needed air, there was a balcony on this floor, one that overlooked much of the city and at this time of night the lights still on were stories to Lena. Stories of people whose lives were quite different than hers, for better or worse, and that thought kept her grounded. As she reached the railing and looked around, she felt completely calm again, hearing the click of heels on cement behind her.

“Lena.” Kara said softly. “Are you-…”

Lena laughed, “Kara, don’t say it.”

Kara returned a relieved escape of air and seemed to relax a little, clutching her purse in front of her.

“I’m sorry I know you hate it, but I can’t help it, your movements, your rhythm, just seemed off,” Kara said as she approached Lena and stood next to her at the railing. “I’m here if you want to talk.”

Lena nodded. But she couldn’t talk about it because she hadn’t told Kara yet. That she killed Lex. She finally did it and it’s been eating away at her piece by piece. But she can’t tell Kara, because Kara is Supergirl and she isn’t ready to deal with that. Lost in her thoughts, a tear escaped from her eye, and rolled over perfect smokey eyed makeup then down her cheek. She wiped it as quickly as it fell but Kara saw.

“Lena, come here.” Kara said as she outstretched her arms towards Lena. Her state of mind ruined her better judgement of what she normally would have done- reject the gesture and move on but she accepted the offer, melting into Kara’s hug, her strong arms mending the sadness and her head perfectly fitting into the taller woman’s chest. Lena only let it last for so long, she backed away with a slight sniffle and smiled at Kara who looked at her with pity that almost made her feel worse. “Ok, let’s go have more fun and not here.”

“Wherever you want to go.” Kara happily replied.

——

Lena led Kara outside and to the car, but before they got in Kara grabbed Lena’s wrist. “Why don’t we walk? It’s such a nice night.”

The face Kara gave is the one Lena could never say no to. The one where she slightly dips her head to side and her blue eyes beg for a _yes_. The last time Lena gave way to this face the two took a trip to Hawaii.

“Sounds good. I’ll be right back,” Lena said, thankful it was the easiest decision she had to make all week. She walked to the driver’s door of her vehicle, her driver put the window down and Lena informed him of her change of plans, and he drove off. As the trunk of the car passed by Lena, Kara was on the other side, as beautiful as ever, smiling and stretched out her arm to Lena with a wiggle of fingers begging Lena to join them. Lena was standing next to Kara all night but the slight breeze outside allowed her to take in the sweet scent Kara was wearing, intoxicating Lena in a different way than the alcohol did. With Kara being slightly taller she always had a half step on Lena but tonight she could tell Kara slowed it down, so they were walking in sync on the sidewalk. Lena lead them down to the harbor, the streets for a Friday night were relatively quiet, but this was Lena’s favorite place. The walkway against the harbor was wide with benches and single planted trees, an iron fence framed the water with the railing wrapped in lights, it felt almost perfect as Lena could hear the water hitting the break wall, boats in the distance with their red and green lights on. The walk led them to the one thing Kara can’t resist, a taco truck. “Ohhhh Lena, yes.” Lena had to clear her throat as Kara didn’t say anything other than that. It was a reminder of her explicit dreams featuring that phrase or something like it the past couple nights. Her mind was steered out of the gutter as Kara pointed to the truck. They walked up and the man behind the counter smiled, “ladies! Dressed up real fancy for truck tacos! What’ll it be?”

Kara chuckled and adjusted her glasses, she ordered three tacos with every topping possible. Lena waited between her selections, guessing when it would end so Lena could order a single taco.

They sat down at a two-person table in front of the truck and Lena was very careful to not mess her lipstick up or spill on her dress. Kara tried, but her dress ended up as a makeshift crumb catcher as she spoke, “this is just what I needed, that drink you made was good but wow, strong, food good.”

Lena nodded, “mission accomplished.”

Kara chuckled, “and what was your mission?”

“Get you drunk.” Lena said flatly with a wink. Except this time Kara was the one choking on her food.

After Kara caught her breath again Lena focused on her with an idea, “After this you want to go somewhere with me before we head home?”

Kara nodded with excitement, “absolutely.”

Lena led them further down the harbor, to the Marina. Kara stopped her before she got to the dock, “Lena, it’s closed.”

“Don’t worry. Trust me.” Lena said as she stepped in front of Kara and offered her hand. Walking in heels on the dock proved trickier than she anticipated so she removed them, and Kara did the same as they made their way down the dock to a slip with a large yacht, _Curie II _displayed on the side. Kara read it out loud and put it all together with a smile and nod, she looked at Lena with her now slightly glassy but beautiful eyes, “permission to come aboard, captain?”

Lena stepped on the boat clumsily over a railing in her long dress, momentarily balancing on her torso on the cold metal until she tipped forward enough to bring her other leg over. It was sloppy and Lena knew she should be embarrassed but she surprisingly wasn’t. Normally there was a ramp but in the middle of the night her crew wasn’t available. “Permission granted.” Lena helped Kara on board and turned some lights on the enormous yacht, showing her rooms off the stern that included a small kitchen with a dining table, a couple bedrooms and a lounge area with a couch, a few chairs and a full bar. The white leather and glass décor she was famous for was extended in the boat as well. The bow was simple, a wood deck that came to a point with a double railing. Lena watched as Kara walked to front and gripped the railing, “this is beautiful, I can’t believe I haven’t seen this before.”

Lena met Kara at the railing, “well I can’t say I’ve made time to be here. We should though, out on the water this is a sight to see.”

Kara looked at Lena with the same eyes as the other night, the look that confused her. The one that she wasn’t sure if she could leap forward and press her lips to Kara’s, but she didn’t. Instead Kara mischievously smirked, turned toward the water and put her feet on the bottom railing, balancing her weight and sticking both her arms out like an eagle and exclaimed “I’m flying!!”

Lena let out the loudest laugh that she had to cover her own mouth and yanked Kara down. “I hate you.”

Kara now laughing, “oh come on like you didn’t love you some Jack and Rose in your life.”

Lena shakes her head, “you’re insufferable.”

Kara tossed her arms up, “Celine Dion, Lena! Celine.”

Lena chuckled once more then adjusted her dress, the ribbing poking her in all the wrong places. “Listen Ms. Winslet – Can I call you Kate? Do you want to change? I have some extra regular clothes here if you want. This dress feels like it’s worn out it’s welcome.”

“Urgh! I thought you’d never ask!” Kara exclaimed.

Lena went into a room and returned with a pair of sweatpants and hoodie for Kara and retreated to the room adjacent to change herself. The rooms were close and there were mirrors on the doors, Lena innocently glanced out and caught Kara facing away from her mid change in the mirror as she just let the straps of her dress down, exposing her toned back. Lena’s throat went dry and quickly shut her door to not invade Kara’s privacy.

Lena returned to the bow and made her way to one of two lounge chairs and sat back with her feet up, closing her eyes, then looking at the sky thinking how perfect this night was even with the distractions. Kara eventually joined her, looking adorable in her new lounge wear, a hoodie that read “Captains sidekick.” Kara pointed to the text and Lena couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t even want to know where you got this from,” Kara said as she laid down in the lounge chair next to Lena.

They sat in silence for a while. Something Lena always has been grateful for, that they could just sit comfortably in silence. Lena breaks the silence, “I love coming out here sometimes, without the city lights I can actually see the stars, it’s a beautiful view.”

“It sure is,” Kara replied but when Lena looked over Kara wasn’t looking up, but directly at her and she is thankful it’s nighttime because her blush would be very noticeable. Kara quickly shifts her attention to the sky as if being caught, “the stars ya, just beautiful,” she says.

Lena turns, curling her body toward Kara and extends her arm as Kara does the same, intertwining their fingers. Lena’s eyes get heavy as she notices Kara’s blinking slowing down as well. The next thing she remembers is blinking her own eyes open to daylight, to her hand still linked in Kara’s on the boat. She smiled as she realized she spent the night with Kara Danvers.


	2. Lay it all out there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena struggles with killing Lex and fears she may have done something to make Kara mad.
> 
> Kara has a conversation with Alex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! thanks for reading. I always wanted to give an alternate space for Lena to cope/grieve about killing Lex. Less fluff in this one but hope you enjoy!

When Lena woke, the light breeze was hitting her exposed skin, it wasn’t much but enough to create goosebumps on the parts where fabric shifted during the night. She heard the calm wake of water hitting the side of the boat and the seagulls off in the distance. She went to withdraw her still clutched hand from Kara’s, but Kara squeezed tighter, preventing Lena from moving. Kara’s eyes were closed, her body was still curled towards Lena and her other hand was tucked under the white cushion below her head, but Lena watched as a smile inched across her now waking face. Lena wanted to kiss it fully awake, rub her thumb over her cheek, wondering how soft her skin would feel right now. Her loose blonde curls were draped around her face and Lena wanted to touch those too, run her fingers through the thick locks. Kara’s eyes started to open, Lena watched the blues of her eyes come to light as she released Lena’s hand and started to stretch. It was her own intimate viewing of a part of Kara’s life she never gets to see, one that would replay in her head for days.

“Morning.” Lena said quietly with a hint satisfaction.

Kara took a deep breath and smiled at Lena, “hello there,” Kara said sleepily, sat up and took a look around, “wow for being boat lounge chairs, that was a pretty comfortable place to snooze.”

“I’m glad. I also have to apologize I didn’t mean for us to spend the night here,” Lena said as she sat up herself, pulling her sweatshirt down over her torso, covering the exposed skin. She glanced up and caught Kara looking at her motions and she abruptly looked away when their eyes met.

“It’s fine,” Kara said with a dismissive wave. “Just glad it’s Saturday.” With that Kara suddenly brought her fingers to the front of her ear, listening for something Lena would never hear.

“Ah. Gotta go. Fire at the fabrication warehouse.” Kara stood up, “I owe you breakfast, Ms. Luthor,” Lena then blushed when Kara winked at her. Kara brazenly removed her glasses, the whole sequence was always a huge turn on for Lena as the super suit materialized around her body, sculpting every Kryptonian muscle. Kara was gone with a gust of wind and Lena let out a breath of air she didn’t realize she was holding in. She rolled her eyes at her own lust. This was only the hundredth time she’d seen Kara turn into Supergirl, but it still felt like the first time, every time.

**

_A long week turned into a fun not so sober night out with a friend Lena has known for only a few months. Lena had already fallen in love with Kara, the immediate head over heels feeling, the I miss you when we don’t talk feeling. She was trying relentlessly to stuff those feelings into a box, but it was tiring. All week something had seemed different with Kara, almost like she had something to tell Lena but would always stop short and offer some shallow question instead. But Lena knew Kara better than anyone, even in a short amount of time of knowing her and would let Kara come to her whenever she was ready, for whatever had her tongue. Lena figured a good night out was what they both needed, she even considered telling Kara about her feelings as dinner turned into a drink then a drink turned into drinks._

_Lena took the last, long sip of her scotch. She was at the point in the night, or early morning rather, where the alcohol no longer burned going down her throat. Lena wasn’t totally drunk, but her lips started to tingle, and her smile was permanent. She was sitting in her little black dress with high heels at a tabletop in the VIP section of a loud bar with Kara sitting across from her. She had done all she could the entire night not to stare but Kara’s choice in tight black jeans and a black tank top was making it an impossible task. _

_“What are you smiling at?” Kara said as she looked up from sipping on her drink._

_Lena smirked and raised an eyebrow. She could answer truthfully that she wanted to take Kara back to her place and do things, not friend things- that would certainly toss Kara’s world upside down, Lena thought. But her more sober and respectful side took over, “I’m just, happy. I’m happy we are here.” _

_“Me too!” Kara beamed back at Lena. “You need another?” Kara motioned to Lena’s empty glass. “Mm, yes, thank you Kara.” Lena inspected Kara for a moment, they had kept pace with each other all night, drink for drink, shot for shot but Kara seemed unfazed, “I don’t understand how your tolerance is so high. It almost makes me want to run tests on you in my lab.” _

_Kara laughed nervously, “well I just think they use a lot of ice here.” _

_“Right,” Lena responded skeptically._

_Kara got up and started towards the bar and cut through the dance floor. Lena watched as Kara leaned into the glass bar top, calling for the bartender as she smiled and struck up a conversation with the stranger next to her, already making them laugh with seconds of talking. ‘That’s Kara,’ Lena thought. _

_Lena then noticed a group of men yelling at each other behind Kara and her new friends. Two men were clearly upset with each other by their close aggressive body language. One man shoved the other into a table. The man whose body flew into the table grabbed for an empty glass bottle, pushed off, and flung himself forward- his target right in front of Kara. Lena watched in horror as the man swung the glass bottle, missing his target and Kara turned at the last second, grabbing the bottle as it shattered into her hands, and the man crashed into Kara knocking her over. Lena audibly gasped and turned sober within seconds as she rushed to help her friend. When she got there Kara had a towel wrapped around her hand, “Kara! Are you okay?” Lena said as she delicately touched Kara’s arm. “Uh- ya ya I’m fine.” Kara stuttered through her response, her eyes searching Lena and the gathering crowd. “Ok well let’s get you to a hospital.” Lena quickly ushered Kara out of the club and put her in the back of her car, telling her driver to take them to the hospital. _

_“Lena it’s really fine, I’ll be ok,” Kara said as she held her towel wrapped hand in the back of Lenas car._

_Lena furrowed her eyebrows. “Kara, it’s not fine, someone shattered glass into your hands and I think you need those- so yes we are going to get medical attention.” _

_“No Lena, please, can we just go back to my place or yours, it’s not that bad, I promise.” Kara pleaded again. _

_Lena looked at Kara like she was crazy, but Kara seemed too desperate to not go to the hospital and who was Lena was to deny anyone being comfortable. “Fine, but when we get back, I’m looking at it.” _

_Kara let out a sigh and looked down at her hand._

_When they got to Lenas apartment, she immediately grabbed supplies from her medical kit and brought them into the Kitchen where Kara was standing next to her counter. “Ok, think I have everything I need for a proper stitch, let’s see the damage,” Lena said as she stuck her hand out to Kara’s, but Kara took a step back. _

_“Lena, wait. I’ve been meaning to talk to you all week,” Kara said as she sheepishly looked at the floor._

_“Kara, can it wait? please give me your hand,” Lena said, closing the distance Kara had created. _

_“No, Stop! Lena, I just- I’m sorry- I have to tell you something. This is hard.” Kara took a breath and looked at Lena with her blue eyes, mouthing words without a sound. “This is crazy- I’m an award-winning journalist I should never not be able to think of words.” _

_Lena was confused but trying to sort through Kara’s very apparent nervousness, “Kara it’s ok, your only human, it happens. Just tell me what’s up.”_

_Kara shook her head, closing her eyes tight, “that’s just it Lena- I’m not.”_

_Lena smiled, more confused than before, “what do you mean you’re not? Not what?”_

_“Human, Lena. I’m not… human,” Kara said as she thickly swallowed and slowly started to unravel the towel around her hand. Lena cocked her head to the side and her eyes went wide as Kara’s now exposed hand wasn’t bloody or broken, but perfect. Perfect just as always._

_She took a step towards Kara’s hand and took it into her own, running her fingers where a gash should be in her palm, looking to the clean towel now on her counter that should be stained red. Lena searched Kara’s terrified eyes, “I’m…I’m Kryptonian, Lena.” _

_“You um- but Superman is um… Krypto-..” Lena tried to speak but her mind went to every situation she should have saw all along and her brain pieced everything together within seconds. It all made sense. Her best friend that never got sick, never got drunk- her best friend that has survived situations that no one had any business surviving, and now looking at Kara, really looking at Kara, “You’re Supergirl.”_

_Lena instinctively took a step back, Kara taking a step forward. “I’m so so sorry I never told you. I’ve been wanting to tell you all week, but I kept pushing it down because I was afraid. I’m afraid that now you know you’ll get hurt or hate me because I’m a super and Lex or-…”_

_“Kara.” Lena said firmly and Kara looked at her with worried eyes._

_“My best friend just told me she is Supergirl, I’m not mad but could you give a girl a minute.” Lena said, slightly chuckling at the end of her sentence._

_“Lena I’m so sorry.” Kara another step towards Lena._

_“Stop apologizing. Kara, I get it. And it strangely makes a lot of sense. I’m glad you told me.” Lena said, reaching out for Kara’s still perfect hand. If anything, Lena kicked herself for not trusting her own instincts that told her time after time that there was something, different, about Kara._

_They stood still for a moment not speaking- just silent understanding of an unbreakable friendship. _

_Kara then brought the fingers of the other hand not holding Lenas to the front of her ear, Lena watching on and not understanding what she was doing. “I gotta go, duty calls and all,” Kara said and the pair lightly laughed, “I’ll come back in the morning, I have so much more to explain, and it involves Alex and everyone else but I just want to be honest with you, Lena.”_

_“Yes, absolutely. Now go!” Lena said, releasing Kara’s hand. _

_Kara smiled and took her glasses off, her super suit started to crawl over her skin in a perfect fit of red and blue complete with a careful aerodynamic structure Lena started to notice now being so close to the show. “I owe you a drink, Ms. Luthor,” Kara said with a wink. _

_“Well now that I’m looking, how did I ever not see it was you,” Lena said baffled, staring at Supergirl._

_Kara laughed then was out Lena’s balcony and into the night in a flash._

_Lena was left in her kitchen stunned, but not entirely surprised. To Kara, telling her she was Supergirl was the biggest thing she needed to do but Lena had hopes of telling Kara how she really felt. But now knowing Kara is Supergirl, Lena felt it was best to keep her secret in for a while. _

_**_

A few days after the gala with Kara, Lena was sitting in her favorite café, Noonan’s, for breakfast. She hadn’t seen Kara since they spent the night on the boat, just a few short texts here and there. It made Lena think for moment that maybe Kara was mad at her. Their conversations were usually light, filled with jokes and elaborate stories about their days. However, the last few days it was short, one or two words here and there as Lena had sent messages trying to pull a bigger reaction but failing miserably. She picked her phone up, thinking about trying again, maybe inviting her to join in a coffee at the café, but decided against it, setting her phone back down on the table.

Lena used the uninterrupted time to get side projects completed, by the time she looked at a clock it was well past lunch. She looked around the café, the faces she saw earlier at the tables around her were long gone, replaced by new patrons and a one very distinctive laugh.

_Kara? _Lena looked around and across the drink counter there she was. Her blonde hair loosely curled on her shoulders, a white button up paired with a matching blue cardigan, adjusting her glasses with her index finger and thumb, _just so,_ by the corner as she laughed at the barista. As soon as Lena felt her heart race Kara looked up and blue eyes met her green in an instant. At first Kara just looked with no smile, no real acknowledgement and Lena knew something was definitely off. Lena never liked games, she reserved those for actual game night, her personal life never had afforded the time to dance around hard subjects. She closed her laptop, quickly slid it in her bag and walked straight for Kara, offering her a wave as she crossed her arms.

“Lena, hey.” Kara said politely, not her usual excited tone.

“Everything ok, I feel like I haven’t talked or seen much of you all week,” Lena said with concern and a smile.

Kara looked tense, the muscle in her neck was strained and her lips were tight, but she seemed to release some it before she spoke, gently slumping down from her tense posture, “Umm, ya. Look Lena, I’ve been meaning to talk to you since this weekend. I’m sorry I’ve been MIA, can I stop by your office later? I just am about to meet someone for an interview.” Lena knew Kara was being sincere when she spoke, but it still made her worry about what she needed to discuss with her. Lena worried she did something wrong or overstepped. Now she had to go about the rest of her day and just wonder what it could possibly be until they spoke. She offered her a slight nod of the head as Kara grabbed her bags and left Lena confused.

——

Lena usually breezed through afternoon meetings. They were always board rooms filled with rich egos she knew how to stroke. She typically knew how to expertly explain the intricacies of the financial budgets of her next project but today she fumbled twice on number projections, her math was wrong, and it was embarrassing to say the least. Lena didn’t like that; she didn’t like the hold Kara had on her entire mood even with an innocent ‘can we talk.’ She still didn’t even know what it was about. Nothing Kara said or did would indicate it was going to be a bad conversation, but Lena had been wracked with so much guilt from her ‘I killed Lex’ secret that even this sent her into a mini spiral.

She went to bed every night, closed her eyes and saw Lex’s face. When she woke up, she swore could see him in the mirror as she brushed her teeth in the silence of her apartment with his smug smile looking at her, laughing at her. If she thought about it, the night on the boat was the best night of sleep she had gotten in a while and that feeling was precious, one she had to hang on to- a feeling Kara gave her without even knowing it.

Lena barely registered a conversation as a member of her board wrapped up the meeting with something about a budget for next year. Lena was too busy staring at her hands, imagining the gun in them, the weight of it, the feel of the cold steel against her skin. It was a moment she never wanted to experience again. Lex was sitting in a chair, rambling on about pressing one little button to end Supergirl. Lena had no choice, really- Lex was about to end the DEO with technology Lena helped him create to protect one of his hidden bunkers from intruders. She knew it would end everyone in that building. But as the gun went off and Lex slumped forward there was a moment of regret. A moment she would replay everyday since then. Lena jumped as she thought about the moment the gun went off, she swore she heard it again, but as she snapped back into reality the the man in front of her was apologizing as he dropped his heavy binder on the floor beside her. Lena took a deep breath as she realized it wasn’t a gun shot but just a pile of papers. She usually waited for all the members to leave before she did herself but this time she left abruptly. Her heart was racing, and she felt like vomiting as she quickly made her way to her office.

Lena told Jess to hold her calls and cancel her last meeting as she rushed past her desk not waiting for a response and shut the door behind her with a loud bang. She braced herself against the back of door, trying to catch her breath and think of something, anything else. She thought of the beach vacation she took three years ago- the waves, the sand, the quiet. Her heart rate started to return to normal and she opened her eyes.

“Kara!” Lena was startled as Kara had flown right into her balcony.

“Shit- Supergirl. I’m sorry, I-…” Lena shook her head, mad at her mistake of using her real name while she was in her super suit.

Kara rushed over to Lena, she was so close to her it would take nothing to-

But Kara already closed the gap, she embraced Lena in her strong arms for a moment without saying a word at first. “Are you okay? I heard you all the way across town -I could hear you, I could feel your panic, I know you didn’t press the watch but I couldn’t not check on you,” Kara said as she searched Lena’s eyes, knowing they may have been filled with tears.

“I’m fine, I just had a moment.” Lena said, releasing from Kara’s embrace and walking more towards the middle of her office.

“Lena.” Kara said with concern.

Lena lied again with a dismissive wave, “it’s fine.”

“I know you’re busy. Please don’t let me hold you up, there is probably a real life or death situation out there,” Lena said as she folded her arms and regained her confident posture.

“Ok. Well, I’ll be back later, and we can talk, ok? I’ll bring dinner?” Kara said, stepping towards Lena, carefully. She felt Kara’s reluctance but did nothing to make it better, nothing to let Kara know how badly she needed her. Lena just nodded instead, and Kara flew out the same way she came in. Lena’s body was finally able to slump down onto her white leather couch, for now she would sit here until she gathered herself for the rest of the day.

——

Back at the DEO Kara was supposed to be helping Alex catch a criminal, but she was distracted.

“Kara are you even listening?” Alex scolded her, even that sentence she barely heard. “Sorry. I just am worried about Lena. She didn’t look well earlier and I don’t how I’m going to tell her,” Kara said as she put her elbows on the conference table in front of her, leaning her face into her hands with a defeated sigh.

“You’re going to tell her? Finally. Took you long enough,” Alex said while looking down a screen.

“What?” Kara was confused.

Alex smirked, “To tell her you _loveee_ her.”

Kara rolled her eyes, “Alex, be serious.”

Alex tossed her hands in the air, “I’m just saying! We’d all be better off! You look at her with puppy eyes all the time. My eyes hurt from rolling so much.”

Kara scoffed, “well I’m so sorry for your eyeballs.”

Alex sighed, “Come on Kara. I know you. And while I do agree there is something up with her, you want to be there for her, but more than a friend.”

Kara looked at Alex, who was staring at her with _that face._ The one where she knows she is right. Kara tried to put on her face where she tells Alex that she is wrong but that would be a lie. The first time she ever met Lena she had Kara turned into mush- a rambling, blushing, awkward mush of a Kryptonian. Lena had Kara mesmerized, not just by her looks but also her brilliant and passionate mind. Kara was rendered useless the first couple times they hung out until she could learn to not get so flustered. Kara never felt like that before. Lena awakened _something _in Kara that day and from that point on as their relationship grew so did Kara. She even knew the moment she fell in love with her. They were having dinner at Lena’s office yet again for the hundredth time, just after her mother went to jail. It was mostly quiet, Kara just wanted to be near her, comfort her after going through the impossible and testifying against the woman who raised her. Lena had every right to be angry at the world, but she sat there and started talking so passionately about a project to help other people in need. The moment meant everything to Kara, it was the words she spoke, it was the way her hair fell down around her shoulders as she let it loose from a tight bun, the way she curled her legs underneath her on the couch they were sitting close on, and the way she just let herself be so open and free with Kara.

Kara turned to Alex, confessing, “Ok, you’re not wrong. But I need to tell her Lex might be dead.”

Alex’s eyes widened, “ya that part is going to suck. But we need to. You- you need to. That needs to come from you.”

Kara nodded in agreement. “I know he sucked, but Lena did love him, he was her brother.”

Alex agreed, standing there a moment with her hand resting on her hips, “I know. But you need to tell her soon before that sleazy journalist who trespassed into her gala writes his story. I mean that asshole thinks Lena did it. He’s going to drag her name through dirt.”

“I won’t let him,” Kara said definitively as she made her way to the exit.

“I know you won’t, and Kara - I’m happy for you.”

Kara turned in the doorway, her determined face turning soft, “thanks.”

——

Lena dotted her ‘I’s’ and crossed her ‘T’s’ on the final contract her eyes needed to see for day and right on cue, Kara entered her office door with two brown bags.

She looked effortless and beautiful, as always.

“Kara!” Lena said, genuinely excited and now miles away from her previous panicked state of mind.

“Hey, Lena!” Kara said as she held up the two bags and smiled.

Lena helped Kara with the bags onto the table in front of the couch. “Burgers. It’s like you can read my mind. You aren’t Hank, are you?”

Kara laughed and it made Lena smile, “I can promise you I am not Hank.”

The pair sat next to each other on the couch, silently eating until their bodies had enough. Kara sat back into the couch, popping the last french fry into her mouth, “so, how are you? From earlier?”

Lena leaned back into a similar position, rested her head back and turned it to look at Kara, “just was a long day. And I was afraid I did something wrong the other night, like you were mad at me or something? I just haven’t heard from you since we stayed the night on the boat.”

Kara furrowed her eyebrows, “mad at you? Never. I’m sorry I’ve just been distracted.”

“What’s got you distracted?” Lena sat up a little straighter.

Kara took a deep breath and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, turning her head to look at Lena. She stayed in that moment for a minute, Lena knew to brace for something, but never expected what she heard next.

“I think Lex is dead,” Kara said.

Lenas eyes widened, panic filled her gut, “excuse me?”

Kara turned toward Lena, knees now barely grazing each other, and Kara reached for her hand, “that jerk of a reporter that crashed your gala, he stopped me as Supergirl in the alley after the fire. He knows Supergirl works with you on occasion, and wanted to know more about you and where you might have been that night I had a run in with Red Daughter. He thinks you killed Lex. He has evidence, possible video footage I guess of you leaving Lex’s hideout, but Lex never left after that. I’m just trying to make sense of it all. So, I think I’m going to try to find Lex first. Before he puts out a total and complete lie about you.”

Lena had to swallow the contents of her stomach coming back up in her throat. She stood up and walked towards the middle of the room, smoothing out her blue dress against her thigh, trying to breathe. Kara stood up and walked toward Lena. “Lena I’m sorry to have been the one to tell you, I just want to help.”

The pair stood in the office, facing each other but feet a part. “Lena, let me help, let me figure this out for you… I can stop this from going-…”

“No!” Lena shouted. “Just- Kara, leave it alone. If he has actual evidence, things he wants to make public I’ll deal with it then.”

Kara shook her head, “what? Lena this guy could do damage to your reputation that you’ve worked so hard to build. This isn’t some small thing.”

Lena took a step toward Kara, angry but not at the blonde, just panic manifesting into harsh words, “You don’t think I know that? That my brother is dead and I - , I- …” the tears threatening behind Lena’s eyes came out and she shook her head and Kara closed the gap between them, putting a gentle hand on Lena’s shoulder, “Lena just talk to me.”

“You’re going to hate me.” Lena said, looking at Kara with pleading eyes.

“Hate you? Lena I could never. Lena, I..” Kara then cupped Lena’s cheek gently with a soft smile, “I _love_ you and yes as friend but also something much more than that. I’ve loved you for as long as I have known your brilliant and bright soul and there is nothing in this world you could do to make me hate you.”

That was it. That was the moment Lena had been waiting for and only dreamed of until this moment but now that it is here she is part terrified at blurting out the truth and part elated at the fact that her feelings for Kara were reciprocated even though Kara had no idea she felt the same.

Lena reached out for Kara, and Kara reached for Lena’s hips, pulling them together. Lena still had tears rolling down her face and Kara brought a hand up to her cheek to wipe them. “Please, just talk to me.” Kara searched Lena’s eyes, but Lena was looking at Kara’s lips, unconsciously licking her own as her eyes flitted to Kara’s. In a non perfect moment, their lips crashed together. Lena wanted to forget telling Kara she killed her brother and Kara’s soft skin and firm grip on Lena’s body was helping until Kara pulled away.

Kara was breathing heavy with a smirk, “Lena as much as I really want to continue, all of that. You need to talk to me. We waited this long we can wait till I know what going on with you.”

Lena stepped back and brought a finger to her lips where Kara’s just were, missing them already and feeling the passionate dampness still stuck on them. But panic from before bubbled up once again, she couldn’t lie, she couldn’t hold it in, it’s already proven to be too much. “I did it, Kara, I killed him, I killed Lex.”

Kara stood in silence. Lena stood across from her already feeling lighter at the omission of guilt but still on the edge of collapse.

Lena pleaded, “say something, please.”

“How?” Kara said and to Lena was relived it came out so much calmer than she anticipated.

“It was after Red Daughter tried to kill you. He was in his office ready to bomb the DEO with kryptonite and whatever else would devastate the entire area. He used technology I was helping him with, he used me and he was going to kill you and everyone I love in a moment and I didn’t know what to do...I had the gun in my hand, it was so heavy and cold and I didn’t want to but I had no choice and I pulled the trigger. I pulled it and he was dead, right there in front of me.” Lena was crying by now and it took her a while to explain it all through tears and pauses to compose herself but with every sentence she spoke she felt every weight slowly start to ease off her shoulder but she was still standing alone, wrapping her own arms around herself as Kara just stood there. She hates her, she knew it, even Kara couldn’t keep that promise, to continue to love a murderer. But then Kara stepped closer and pulled Lena into hug that made her weep more, Kara’s fingers tangling in the back of her dark hair as Lena’s tears-soaked Kara’s sweater.

“Shhh, it’s ok, it’s ok. I can’t believe you’ve been carrying this alone. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. We will figure this out I promise,” Kara said with certainty to her voice as she brushed a fingertip to Lena’s jaw, willing it to look up at her. When Lena could see her blue eyes again, Kara cupped her cheeks once more. “Hey.” Kara smiled, “I got you, it’ll be ok. I’m not going anywhere,” she pressed a gentle kiss to Lena’s forehead and brought her back into an embrace and with that, Lena believed her and for the first time in months she didn’t feel so alone.


End file.
